Dial T for telemarketer are M for Murder?
by Asahi the storyteller
Summary: Melanie is at home Babysiting the Neighborhood kid's when she get's a odd phone call. A one shot that pays tribute to my fav part of the movie!


**That evening**

Everyone is sitting in the living room and Sissy is telling Melanie about the adventures she had during the afternoon. "And Shanley made us play Lassie, you see she was Lassie, and we had to climb into the ditch and she had to find Timmy to tell him that we where trapped. But she never came back. Kat and me got tired of watching Christa trying to eat bugs so we got out. When we found Shanley she told us that she forgot that she didn't know anyone named Timmy, and that she wasn't allowed to talk to strangers." As Sissy finishes her tale the phone rings

Melanie: "Hello?"

Voice: "Hello?"

Melanie: "Yes?"

Voice: "Who is this?"

Melanie: "Who are you trying to reach?"

Voice: "I don't know."

Melanie: "I think you have the wrong number."

Voice: "Do I?"

Melanie: "It happens. Take it easy."

"Who was that?" Asahi asks. "Wrong number," answers Melanie. Then the phone rings again.

Melanie: "Hello?"

Voice: "I'm sorry. I guess I dialed the wrong number."

Melanie: "So why'd you dial it again?"

Voice: "To apologize."

Melanie: "You're forgiven. Bye now."

Voice: "Wait! Wait! Don't hang up! I want to talk to you for a second."

Melanie: "Are you a telemarketer or something like that?"

Voice: "Why don't you want to talk to me?"

Melanie: "What company are you from?"

Voice: "You tell me your name, I'll tell you mine."

Melanie: "Ahh, I don't think so".

Voice: "What's that noise?"

Melanie:" Shanley is making some popcorn".

Voice: "You're making popcorn?"

Melanie: " No, Shanley is. Are you deaf or something?"

Voice: "I only eat popcorn at the movies. Are you fixing to watch a movie?"

Melanie: "Good for you, if it will make you stop calling I'LL take your goofy survey. Yes, ) I watched a movie earlier. It was a scary one."

Voice: "Really? What?"

Melanie: "Oh. Just some scary movie".

Voice: "You like scary movies?"

Melanie: "What! Hold on. Hush!" she tells the girls, who are arguing about the popcorn flavors.

Voice: "I asked if you like (The microwave beeps) movies?"

Melanie: "No."

Voice: "What's YOUR favorite?"

Melanie: "Uh, I don't know. How can you ask a question like that? Hold on." Melanie turns to the others. "Hey guys! This telemarketer wants to know what my favorite stupid movie is. What should I say?"

Voice: "Uhh wait that's not"

Melanie: "Hush, WE'RE working on it. Ok! We have three votes for "Kill Bill" because the human body does not have that much blood in it, and three votes for "Mars Attacks."

Voice: "SCARY MOVIE! NOT STUPID MOVIE!"

Melanie: "Oh, sorry, I don't know."

Voice: "You have to have a favorite. What comes to mind?"

Melanie: "Oh! The Ring! YEAH, that movie was the bomb diggity."

Voice: "Bomb diggity? No one ever says bomb diggity anymore!"

Melanie "I do! We have four votes for "The Ring", and two for "Resident Evil". Sissy SAYS ) that "Resident Evil" would have had her vote but a mutated zombie Chihuahua would have been scarier than a Doberman pinscher. Oh and Asahi wants to know what yours is?"

Voice: "Guess."

Melanie: You suck at this, don't you? I have never had to take such a horrible survey before in my life!"

Voice: "You never told me your name."

Melanie: "Why do you want to know my name?"

Voice: "Cause I WANT TO know who I am looking at."

Melanie: "What did you say?"

Voice: "I want to know who I am talking to, Blondie."

Melanie: "That's not what you said! Hey wait a second, my hair is brown!"

Voice: "No, it's not."

Melanie: "DUHH! Yes it is! And I have all the curtains closed so you CAN'T see me either."

Voice: "Wait! Isn't this (555) 554-4444?"

Melanie: Uh, I don't think so. This is (444) 445-5555.

Voice: "Oh, sorry." Click.

Melanie looks at the phone and, putting it down on the base, she mutters, "Dummy dumb head." "Melanie! You have blond hair, not brown," Kat says, glaring at Melanie. "And you TOLD us to never lie!" Melanie looks at Kat in disbelief. "He was a REALLY bad telephone survey guy! I REALLY DIDN'T want to have him call all night now, did I?"


End file.
